No Motivation? Read this.

This is a reblog of a post by Be inspired. It has so much value that I just had to share.

Be Inspired..!!

If you’re in desperate need of some motivation, we’re going to fix that problem, right here, right now. Prepare yourself.

Desperate times call for desperate measures. You said you needed motivation. I’m going to do what needs to be done to get your ass in gear. NO EXCUSES. If this isn’t the kind of motivation you need, leave now. You’ve been warned.

Here goes :

  1. Write Down your “Why’s” – Write down all your reason for wanting to achieve whatever it is you are trying to achieve. Be specific and then keep the list somewhere handy to refer to when you are flagging. 
  2. Set Goals – Set long term goals and then spilt them down into monthly goals. Make sure they are specific, realistic and have timescales. Write your goals down. Split them down again into smaller weekly “to-do”lists.
  3. Try the “two minute” rule – Set a timer and then make yourself work on a…

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Kids will be Kids

 

 

 

The other day, I was sitting in my car in the driveway,  waiting for it to warm up.  As I sat there, I noticed two kids around the age of 8 years old, walking to school.  I noticed that neither one of them had their hoods on, even though it was very cold outside.  As I sat and watched them, a few things occurred to me.  It seems uncommon to watch children actually walk to school these days.  More often than not, parents are driving their kids to school if the kids aren’t taking the bus. If you live within a certain proximity to the school, your child is assigned as a ‘walker’.  Most of these ‘walkers’ get rides from their parents.  As I watched these two little ones, it felt very refreshing to watch them walk to school together, on their own, without parents hovering.  It made me smile to see something that took me back to my childhood.  How can children learn to become independent if they aren’t even allowed to walk to school alone?  It’s only a block or two away.  In my mind, I find this very sad.  I watch as parents indulge their children at every turn.  It is not abuse to expect your child to walk to school if they are assigned as ‘walkers’.  The simple act of walking to school, or to walk to their friends house seems to be disallowed.  The result of this indulgence by parents will enable a child to grow up and expect even more from those around them.

It’s a bigger issue here than just allowing children to go outside by themselves.  You rarely see children playing with neighborhood kids anymore.  The parents take the kids over to their friends house and pick them up.  God forbid, they require their children to get any physical activity whatsoever.  This is creating a self indulgent society for the future and we wonder why “kids” in their 40’s are still living at home with their parents.

Anyway, as I sat watching these two children, I mentioned that they didn’t have their hoods on even though it was very cold.  At that moment, I watched two 8 year olds actually think for themselves and lift their hoods on because they felt the cold.  Imagine that.  They were capable of making a good decision even without the parents hovering over them.

Being the observer of these kids for just a few moments, gave me great insight.  First, it warmed my heart to see them doing what all kids should be doing and that is walking to school by themselves.  In this society today, we live in fear of everything and we are passing that fear along to the children.  Living in fear will only create hardships.  I would love to see the children living in love, being open to the world around them.  Instead, they are holed up in their homes, playing video games and afraid to talk to people face to face.

The second thing that I realized was that without any prompt from a parent, they instinctively put their hoods on when they felt cold.  Children are smart.  They know when they are cold or not.  Parents have taken away these small lessons of children thinking for themselves and making their own decisions by insighting fear into everything and not allowing these children the space to evolve into full functioning adults, one step at a time.

Two small children gave me a bountiful gift that day.  They gave me great joy by watching children be children.  I smile when I see children playing ball in the street in my neighborhood.  It’s not something you see too often anymore.  It’s so sad to know that kids aren’t being kids anymore.  I’m even more sad to know that it’s happening because of parents’ inability to cope with their own fears and challenges.  It’s creating a cycle of sadness, dependance and self indulgence.  I can only pray that there are still those families that are willing to ‘live on the edge’ and allow the kids to be kids and learn the things that life can teach them in simple daily activities.

Visiting the Tax Man

 

 

The way my brain works is a wonder.  Sometimes, I surprise myself by the craziness that ensues while the wheels turn inside this clock of mine.

Recently, we went to get our taxes done.  I am very particular when it comes to having everything organized and ready for the tax man.  By nature, I am a very organized individual.  I have a folder for all the owner’s manuals from items that we have bought.  I still have owner’s manuals for items that are long gone.  But, if something goes wrong with the lawn mower, the treadmill, the television or the dog feeder, there’s an owner’s manual in that folder just waiting to be read.  My boyfriend admires me for keeping good records.  I admit, I am a little over the top.  Anyway, that is just the tip of the iceberg when it comes to organization of financial or important materials.

Last year, we went to get our taxes prepared and we were listing the donations.  Of course, I have all receipts to back up my listings but there is a gray area.  That would be donations of clothing.  Usually, I bag everything up and take it to the local donation box.  I then grab a receipt and estimate an amount that I think the bag is worth.  Our tax man said that he thought that I was undervaluing those items.  He suggested that I take a picture of the items so that the following year we could get a better idea of the value of the clothes.  For the entire year of 2018, I took photos of each and every item that I donated.  When we had our taxes done and came to the donations part, I handed the tax man a stack of pictures of each and every item.  He looked at me like I had 3 heads.  I responded to him by reminding him that he was the one who told me to take pictures.  He laid each and every picture out all over his desk and with a smirk, he called in his assistant and asked him, “What do you think this Tshirt is worth?”.  At that point, I was embarassed along with my boyfriend and step-daughter.  The laughter ensued and we couldn’t stop.  We literally took picture by picture and estimated it’s worth.  Our tax man had never dealt with anything like this before.  I think he might have thought I was crazy but I was just following instructions.  That situation is going down in history like so many other ridiculous things that I do.

 

Doggy Duty

I took Shadow to the dog park today.  We usually go at the same time so he hangs out with the same group of dogs.  They have their own little pack now.  Today we had a special visitor named Sheena.  Shadow and Sheena have met before.  They are both around the same age, 10 or 11 months old.  They play perfectly together and run like the wind.  It is glorious to watch them run the entire length of the park with the wind in their hair.  They don’t have any worries.  The only thing that matters is the joy they are feeling in that very moment.

I have never really paid attention to dogs at play before.  I am becoming fascinated with their interactions.  They share a language that only the dogs know.  If you watch closely you start to pick up on their conversations.  For instance, there is one dog at the park that does not like Shadow.  He has never liked him.  I don’t know why,  but Shadow is young and still learning to pick up cues from other dogs.  He doesn’t always understand that they are not in the mood to play.  Most of the other dogs are tolerant and are teaching him what their behavior means.  He’s starting to get it.  The one dog that doesn’t like him, certainly makes it known that he is not a fan of Shadow but for some reason Shadow refuses to believe him and then a riot ensues.  I am noticing now that Shadow is starting to step back when that particular dog growls at him, but he doesn’t always back away.  He better figure it out soon, though.

As I watch the dogs play, I notice that they like to spar.  They both jump up on their two back legs and come at each other in a way that may look threatening but they are careful not to hurt one another.  They mouth each other and nip at each others’ ears.  But there is no intent to injure when they are in full play mode.  They automatically know not to bite down too hard.  Of course, there are occasions when that happens and there will be a loud yelp but no harm ,no foul.

When a dog means harm, there is no doubt what is happening.  You cannot misinterpret their cues.  Not from the human standpoint.  When they are agitated, they will make their intentions known immediately.  Shadow, on the other hand, will learn one way or another.  When I notice a problem arising, I immediately leash Shadow and walk him away from the ruckus.  All of the other dog owners do the same.  We have a little community at the dog park and we realize that some personalities just won’t mesh.

While watching the dogs interact, I realized that if humans interacted like the dogs, there would never be misunderstandings.  Dogs don’t talk about each other and spread rumors.  They do what they do and if they don’t like what is happening, they share that very loudly and clearly.  It would be great if humans could just say what’s on their mind, have it out and move on.  It would only take a second for the situation to be solved.  But, there’s the whole, getting feelings hurt stuff.  Yes, I guess humans have it a little bit more complicated.  It would feel so good if you got in a situation with someone and you didn’t like what they did or said, so you just spurted out what you thought, true to your deepest feelings ,and then both parties would just walk away with no hard feelings.  Unfortunately, that’s not how the world works.  Every now and then, I would love to just shout out what I am really thinking.

There is a lot of joy in watching the dogs run free and wild.  There are also lessons we can learn while watching.  But, humans are not dogs and we do get our feelings hurt.  We have a right to have different opinions but we do not have a right to hurt each other. Eventually, I think we will also figure it out, one way or another.  Hopefully, peace and harmony will be the outcome.  Meanwhile, I will continue to admire the strength, and willingness to have fun as I watch my four legged friends frolick in the park.

 

Heart and soul

A fellow blogger, Cristian Mihai, wrote this blog and it is so powerful that I just had to share.

Cristian Mihai

The only calibration that counts is how much heart people invest, how much they ignore their fears of being hurt or caught out or humiliated. And the only thing people regret is that they didn’t live boldly enough, that they didn’t invest enough heart, didn’t love enough. Nothing else really counts at all. – Ted Hughes

You’re going to die. No, this is not some metaphorical bullshit. You are going to die. They are going to plant you in the ground, and all that you are will decay until there’s nothing left. Your bones will turn to dust and that dust will get carried on through the ages.

Your time on this earth is limited. How do you want to spend it? Think about it. I mean, really think about it.

Lukewarm is no good. Being fearful is not worth it. Worrying about what other people think or say or…

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It’s Time to Play

I decided to sit down at the computer and write at this moment.  I have a craving to write something.  I just don’t know what it is yet.  I have to let it simmer for a bit.  “It”, being my writing subject.  Sometimes, I don’t need a subject at all.  Maybe some of you remember the show “Seinfeld”.  It was called the show about nothing.  The show about nothing became a cultural icon.  It seemed that everyone related to the normal daily thoughts and feelings of everyday people.  We were able to laugh out loud because the subjects covered were so familiar to us.  It’s a great feeling to know that so many others are thinking and feeling the same way we are.  It’s comforting  that we are not alone in our madness.

It’s snowing this morning here in New Jersey, United States.  It looks pretty,  but honestly, I don’t know too many people that are happy to see the snow.  It causes disruption for commuters.  Everyone gets in a frenzy when it snows.  They rush to the grocery store to buy milk, bread and eggs.  Lest we starve!  It’s 2 inches of snow, not the end of the world.  Snow silently and peacefully enters our reality, all the while, glittering and sparkling it’s freshness upon the earth’s surface.  The beauty it bestows is celestial.  Adult humans seem to have a tendency to skew reality.  Our perceptions change the actuality of everything.   A small child, on the other hand, can look out the window and see wondrous potential in the falling snow.  Bountiful creations whirl around in their mind of how they can pick up this fluffy white stuff and make anything out of it.

I will call my mother this afternoon, as I do every day.  We will talk about our day and complain about the snow.  Neither one of us has to go outside and trudge through it to get to a designated place of employment but, nonetheless, we will complain that we don’t like the snow.  Doesn’t that sound like madness to you?  I’m shaking my head at my own self.  Where has that child in me gone?  Why can’t I see the beauty that has laid itself before me?

I realize that I have allowed grown up life to skew my perceptions of pure joy.  I can’t see the purity of the falling snow anymore.  It’s time for me to shake it off and get in touch with this beautiful endowment from the heavens.  There is so much beauty here and I have allowed myself to be blinded by past conditioning, pain and suffering.  I have consensually given away my sight so that I might live in fear and anguish.

Today, this moment, I must realign myself with the universe and forget about the past.  I must get myself up and show up with full spirit.  Today, I will play in the snow and enjoy all that it has to offer and I will come out triumphant, if only for a few moments, and feel alive again with the sight of a child.

I find it amazing that I sat down to write with no thought of any subject to write about.  So, I decided to talk about the weather and look where it took me.  I think that’s pretty cool.  I love how things unfold out of our minds if we are able to sit still for a little bit and let it flow.  I’m totally loving this process.